Congress Votes to Solve the Nation's Energy Problem

Despite massive opposition from energy lobbies and most Republicans, the US Congress passed legislation today overturning the first and second laws of thermodynamics.

The bane of mechanics since the start of the industrial age, the laws of thermodynamics limited the amount of work that could be produced with any given amount of energy. With those laws now overturned, absolutely anything is possible in the months and years ahead.

Some expected gains are perpetual motion machines, SUVs that can drive thousands of miles on a single gallon of gas, and even the long awaited flying car. Many other life-changing inventions are expected as scientists and engineers the world over applaud the courageous action taken by Congress on this historic day.

President Obama agreed. "This is what change looks like," the President said in a televised speech. He then continued to praise Congress saying, "Make no mistake, this bold action will give America the energy independence it so richly deserves." President Obama concluded his speech expressing hope that the Senate would follow the heroic example shown in Congress by voting to pass the bill when the Senate reconvenes next week.

Many Republicans objected. While acknowledging that the bill would provide for all the country's energy needs, most Republicans voted against it, saying it would weaken the industries that helped make America the best nation on the planet. "The oil companies that made America great shouldn't be punished in this way," John Boehner, the Republican Speaker of the House, was often quoted in the days leading up to the vote. However, appeased by numerous bail-out provisions inserted in the bill, thirty Republicans crossed party lines to help bring about the 220 to 211 victory.

America is on the mend.

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